The Sportsman

At his daughter's request, Armand once wrote some forty-six pages of family history and his childhood in Detroit. What follows is a humorous recounting of his sports career at Detroit Country Day School (DCDS):

I played a few days of football at DCDS, without real instruction. I was told to stop the big guy with the ball. I stopped him, for a second, getting flattened. Again flattened, next play. After that, I stepped aside, not being completely stupid. All I recall of football - it wasn't touch!

High school football! I got a letter as a waterboy (shades of Adam Sandler). Big blue sweatshirt with orange or yellow "D", I recall. I also took the news of our scores to the Detroit papers. News, Free Press, and Times (Wm. R. Hearst's rag - the only paper that paid me - one dollar for team names and score) - we usually lost.

Chauffeur drove me downtown. 9th grade or 10th, probably. I was on the golf team as a junior, but never asked to play. D.C.D.S., like Amherst, nuts on sports: "mens sana in corpore sano" - "healthy mind in a healthy body" was the school's motto. I also had to go out for archery, but couldn't hit the straw target with my bow.

Basketball, I shot underhanded (we all did then). No good making baskets, but on defense, if not seen by the ref, I'd grab potential shooters around the arms so they couldn't shoot. Career again defaulted.

One game I was timekeeper for last few minutes. I forgot to start stopwatch for a few seconds of time out. Other team's coach at end of the game demanded extra minute or so. They made a last-second goal and won. Our school lost a rare chance at winning (eleventh grade, maybe).

I remember: I loved and was damned good at just one sport - softball. One sand lot game (I was twelve or so?) they couldn't strike me out. Finally agreed if not a home run, I would be considered out. Still invulnerable.

I was no good in basketball at DCDS. Took up golf in the 11th grade. I was only good at putting - good at miniature golf courses around town - very popular then. I never could skate at all well - never tried roller skates - just ice skating and fell down constantly - week ankles.

I was good in manual training - DCDS had us build a snow-sled slide - a tall wooden job, and help build the manual training building (the class ahead of us did most of the work). Baseball diamond (I was no good at hard ball - wore glasses from the 10th grade on and was scared of being hit) out by a sand hill. Kids dug a tunnel under the hill and made a sand cave. Then drove an airshaft down to the cave.

Then someone shoved me down the shaft up to my head, went into the cave, removed my shoes from below and tickled my feet when I couldn't move (hands and arms were tight in the shaft). Fine children! No wonder I am claustrophobic!

Photo: Seattle Municipal Archives