Where's Armand?

Speaking of Limericks

Picture Armand at the podium, reciting one of his many limericks at the Far West Popular Culture Association's gathering in Las Vegas this weekend.

In Writing Limericks for Fun and Profit, author Robert Birch, Ph.D., mentions Armand and one of his books:

Armand Singer, in his Introduction to the book 1001 Horny Limericks claims "The limerick's subject matter is, simply put, sex and filth, in all their ludicrous, bawdy, nasty, perverted, all-too-human guises." He goes on to write, "Filthy as it is, but as well the limerick is an ideal vehicle for mockery. It can, and often does, poke fun at mores, sex, politics, religion -all of civilization's pious verities."

The most amazing thing about Armand in Las Vegas, is the fact that he was in the hospital this time last week! As soon as they let him out of the facility, he flew away. Free Again!

Photo:Riverside Toastmasters

Viva Las Vegas!

Armand is at the Imperial Palace in Las Vegas today, attending the Far West Popular Culture Association conference. He will be giving a limerick reading tomorrow afternoon.

What would you be doing four days after surgery if you were 92 years old?

Free again!

"I beat the rap again! I'm just not so sure if it's the rap I thought I was being detained for." -Armand Singer, post-surgery,1/25/07

Armand has had two surgeries this past week to thwart kidney failure. At the risk of relaying incorrect information, let me just say that Mondo went in for  a radiator overhaul and the mechanic opted to clean out the radiator hose instead.

His second surgery was on Monday and he's home today. "Just say that at 2pm on Thursday, the weather here has gotten better." Is he just laying in bed, looking out at the brighter day? No!

"I'm going to call up my doctor and give him hell. Then call up the folks who are supposed to give me a ride to Pittsburgh tomorrow to catch my flight to Las Vegas, and then I'll start packing. I'll be home on the 30th and then fly to Chile."

He admitted to feeling a bit weak, "You can't lie in bed for a week and expect to feel good. I tried walking up and down the corridors but it's a bit tricky when you have to drag along that contraption that holds those IV bottles and things, a cane, AND someone that has to follow you so you don't trip and fall and sue them!"

I told him that he sounded strong and healthy and Armand said, "Well, you don't want me to sound the way I actually feel!" Once again, feigning the voice of a tortured old man. Ready to get on with his day he bid me farewell: "Okay, you know as much as I do now. Bye!"

Detroit Country Day School

He was there, I believe in the 1920's. Armand is an educated guess and continues to disturb the norm.

For example, a recent headline announced: "Study finds better-educated older adults had greater declines in word memory than their less educated peers."

Test subjects were instructed to read 10 common nouns and then asked to remember them five minutes later. The scientists determined that past age 70, those who had a higher level of education had a more difficult time remembering than those who were less educated.

Dr. Armand Singer, at 92, appears to still be a student of language. He's awesome! Perhaps as one who commented on the study remarked: In short, could it be that educated people have more interesting things on their minds then 10 random nouns?

That would be Armand.

More on 'the study' at Collision Detection.

Painting of a Boy Reading by Carolyn Anderson.

DQ as HQ

I wrote down the dates and places of Armand's 2007 travel plans and then just to be sure that I had not left out a country I asked, "Is that all for the year?" Feigning the voice of a tortured old man he replied, "Can't I just stay home sometime?"

When the man stays home (sometimes) he should be a fairly easy subject to spot and photograph. Folks in Morgantown must surely see this gentleman with a walking stick hooked on his arm as he slurps his favorite treat from the Dairy Queen on High Street. I think it's a regular 'pit stop' for Armand.

When I searched for the street address of the DQ, I found a review by a woman named Sarah who lives in Grafton, WV. I think I'll send her a message: "Where's Armand?" 

Awesome!

"I find it rather amusing, the way the word 'awesome' is used these days," Armand offered. "A woman at dinner last night kept saying that the meal was awesome. Well, the meaning of awe, I believe, comes from the Greek word achos, which means pain. I don't think she meant to say that the meal was painful. Well, so much for that."

I remembered that conversation when I came upon this article today, It would be "awesome" if "Tom/Kat" "went missing". Armand is so far ahead of the crowd. He's awesome prescient.

Photo by:Irish

...and the award goes to

Leslie Laird of Volcano, HI, correctly identified "With affection beaming in one eye and calculation shining out of the other" as a line from The Life and Adventures of Martin Chuzzlewit by Charles Dickens. Congratulations, Leslie!

Runners-Up are:

• Mona Toyama, Tokyo, Japan
• Christine O'Neill, Ventura, CA
• Karen Gremp, Kailua-Kona, HI
• Cindy Heiskell, Morgantown, WV

Thank you for participating, you intelligent and well (br)read women!!

Photo:Shannon K

A Contest!

"With affection beaming in one eye and calculation shining out of the other."

Armand proudly showed me his recently published "Catalog of Himalayan Mountaineering Correspondence" during his latest trip to Kona. The man's dreams are not idle, he writes and publishes, reserves a flight and off he goes. You may rest assured that there will be Armand Adventures in 2007 to match the past twelve months.

I began reporting on his whereabouts in June 2006 and look forward to another year of Mondo-logues and Singer- isms.

In celebration of our year with Armand, here's a contest: Where does the title quote "With affection beaming in one eye and calculation shining out of the other" come from and who is the author? The first person to contact me with the correct answers wins an Armand t-shirt of choice.