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Learning to Speak

Speak only the speech that neither torments self nor does harm to others. That speech is truly well spoken. Speak only endearing speech, speech that is welcomed. Speech when it brings no evil to others is pleasant. -- Subhasita Sutta

Here's an experiment we're doing this week in the Yoga for Women class:

Try not to speak about someone who is not physically present. If you must refer to someone who is absent in order to answer a question or communicate plans, then speak of them as if they were there.

It's already proving to be a challenge for me because I have a brother laying in a hospital in San Francisco with my mother and another brother there with him. Between phone calls, e-mail and text messages to family and friends, I'm speaking a lot about people who are not physically present. I seem to time my lessons well.

If you're interested, read the short article which was my inspiration for Saturday's class: Skillful Speech by Allan Lokos. Join our experiment for the week or even a day. I suspect that when we begin to think more before speaking in public, we will do the same with our mental chatter, where most of the unskillful speeches are made.



Image: ArtLurker.com

The 12 Nights of Christmas, 2009

In 2007, I participated in the Twelve Nights of Christmas as created by Lynn Jericho, from December 25 to January 5. Lynn presented a new theme each day and we were to spend twelve minutes nightly, on each topic.

Inner Christmas is a nightly practice of inner work. I recommend "twelve minutes" of practice each night. Because twelve is the number of completion, "twelve minutes" is however many minutes of contemplative inner work it takes for you to find a new insight or relationship to yourself. You will know you have reached this completion when you feel an inner "aha" or an inner bell starts to chime in your soul. It may come quickly some evenings. Or it may take longer in clock measured minutes.

Remember wonder and wisdom live in questions, not answers. When an answer comes into your thoughts work with it until it transforms into a new question. Do not be surprised to find the cosmic bell ringing in your soul when you find your own questions.

The "twelve minutes" can also be spiritually measured as the time it takes for new light to dawn in your soul, illuminating some new aspect of your life. You begin the practice in the darkness of soul night and end it with the dawning of a new soul day. It is a joy to experience the inner Sun rising in your soul.

In our busy, chaotic lives it is often difficult to devote any time to the stillness of inner work. If all you can manage is the time it takes to read the Twelve Holy Nights' messages, be glad. The spiritual world does not work within the earthly measurements of time and can provide your soul with great renewal in a moment. Read the message with your seeking heart - the love of the spiritual world will meet you. You may find earthly time expands through this openness.

This year, I decided to do the same but utilizing the images created by Penelope Clement, a frequent Kona Yoga attendee, and asked this past Saturday's Yoga for Women class to select the cards/topics. I chose the order that they'll be presented and Penny has graciously sent a brief comment for each card. Each day, beginning Christmas Night and ending on January 5,  I'll post a picture of the chosen card along with comments, insights and suggestions. If you'd like to, here are ways to participate:

• Log on to LessonsInBalance.com to read the day's post.

• Send me an e-mail address that you'd like to have each day's post delivered to (December 25-January 5 only).

• Share your thoughts and opinions through the Comments section.

If anything, check-in to see the twelve striking images that were chosen, sight unseen by six different people. The deck is one of the best gifts I gave myself this year.

Image The High Priestess  by Penelope Clement: "Direct connection to the divine through intuition. The sacred feminine principle. What is your intuition telling you today?" Oil & acrylic, 3'X4'.

Free to Choose

The more decisions that you are forced to make alone, the more you are aware of your freedom to choose.
-Thornton Wilder

 

Prompted by a conversation with a pregnant woman regarding all of the decisions she faces in preparation for her child's birth, I was curious about the thought process. So, Making Decisions was the topic of my Saturday yoga class.

As usual, I posed a question, we discussed it, and I tried my best to blend the postures and the topic. We tried keeping still in a pose and moving deeper, only after deciding what the movement would be. Too often we move before thinking and let our physical bodies dictate our actions, good or not so good. We also tried to elicit thoughts of joy and happiness regardless of what our physical bodies were doing. Too often we wait to be physically at ease in order to be happy. In that class, we aimed to be pleased, whether we were in challenging one-legged poses or being assisted by a friend in stretching postures. Deciding to be happy and content, was the lesson.

Three hours later, I was standing in line for another exercise: my right to vote. The poll watchers were tired. It was three in the afternoon and you could see the "why did I sign up for this" expression in various forms on every face. As I stood in line, questions came sporadically: "Did you check to see if your name is listed?", "What's your last name? Stand in that line then." (The line that I'd been standing in for the last 3 minutes).

I signed in, a woman slowly tore off a paper ballot for me and then carefully folded and tore a two inch strip off my ballot and handed me my receipt. As I walked to the voting booth, I stuck my driver's license and the receipt into my wallet.

I read the instructions: #1: Select one political party, #2: Vote only for candidates of the party you selected. #3: Remember to vote for the Special Nonpartisan offices. These were followed by names listed next to little rectangles. How do I mark these boxes? Will my left-handed check marks be accepted?

I looked all over the ballot and couldn't find any instructions. I looked around the booth for instructions that might be posted, as they have been in the past. Nada. So I decided that an "X" would be as generic as I could make a mark.

When I got to my car and put my wallet away, I looked at my ballot receipt and saw the bold title: VOTING INSTRUCTIONS with an idiot proof illustration of a hand shading in the rectangle (correct) and a crossed out check mark (right-handed version) and "X" (incorrect). "*!^&", I said. Why wasn't that listed on the ballot? Was it meant to be torn off and handed to me for special emphasis (which it was not)?

I was livid (a more civilized description) as the three lucky people I called will confirm. A few hours later, as I do with every situation that takes me to the State of Livid, I thought about the lesson being offered. No one made me put an X in the box, it was my decision. I could have stepped outside the booth and gone back for clarification. I had choices, I always have choices. Take away my right to choose and then I'd have cause to be livid, in an uncivilized manner too. If I make a poor decision, I still have a choice as to how I want to react!

We experienced it in yoga class that morning: choose to act rather than react; if you have to react, choose how you want to feel about it. This lesson has taught me to turn down the volume on all the political babble that will take place in the next month. I can't expect the mainstream media to hand me my VOTING INSTRUCTIONS. I'll have to look for the candidates and parties who will give me the best choices and then decide and vote. Hopefully, with the right mark this time. Once the process is over, I've decided to feel good about those who are elected. I want to live in a place where I'll always have choices.

Photo: rcvernor

Looking Past Illusions

I learned what is obvious to a child. That life is simply a collection of little lives, each lived one day at a time. That each day should be spent finding beauty in flowers and poetry and talking to animals. That a day spent with dreaming and sunsets and refreshing breezes cannot be bettered.
-Nicholas Sparks

In the spirit of Easter, we introduced ourselves in Saturday's class with our first names and a description of something that we would like to revive, re-experience or renew. Mentioned, were things like reviving cancelled movie sitcoms, re-experiencing home-cooked dinners on the beach, eating healthy and getting back to creative pursuits. Simple actions and processes, nothing big or fancy.

Doesn't it seem as though we look at the future and dream big and wide, yet look back for the small, bright spots? I think it's because we just want to feel good, and that projected or recalled emotion can only take place in the present. Children seem to do it best, reveling in the simple joys of the present. Their attention spans are short for all things mundane and waiting is not a game they enjoy.

In order to experience the joys of our past and the hopeful happiness of the future, we have to hold those intentions in the present. All of our power is in the present . So in class, we moved through yoga postures while counting our breaths. We chose the movements we felt were necessary, before enacting them. While it may sound serious and somber, there was actually a lot of giggling and gaiety. There are so many illusions to look past when you're trying to focus.

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Just for fun, try this Awareness Test (You Tube, 01:08).

How to Raise a Happy Child, by the Baby Center.

Happy Childhood Memories Breath Spray, $4.99.

Photo of Adario and Hayden at the Hawaii Volcano Observatory: Geno Ortiz.

The Lights Are On Because Somebody's Home

People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

"Thank you for bringing such interesting people together in your classes", a woman said to me on Saturday. Yoga for Women, follows a novel format in that it lasts for two hours because we gather in a circle for the first thirty minutes to introduce ourselves and discuss a chosen topic before the experience of yoga postures.

This past week, each participant was asked to share something about themselves that others might find "interesting". What prompted me was the fact that we have many part-time residents in our classes who come away from very different settings and lifestyles when they enter the studio.

Carole Kaeding is one example. She'll be returning very soon to Michigan where she owns Gratiot Lake Basketry. When she retired (many years ago, she says) and took up basket making, she found a need for a consistent supply of materials. She became that supplier and today has a successful business staffed with the most capable people, which allows her the time to come back every year to Kona and yoga.

Surrounding Carole were some other very special women who varied in age and life experience. They have travelled the world solo or taken up a new language. They are exploring different cultures and art forms or discovering hidden talents and hobbies. They seek the excitement of exploring lava tubes, beginning a new service for the elderly or just having fun in life playing and travelling.

I then introduced a restorative yoga sequence meant to alleviate fatigue by soothing and then energizing the adrenal glands. Some of the dozen or so postures had to be modified for the varying degrees of yoga experience and physical limitations but once everyone reached their perfect position, it was a sight to behold! When we learn how to be comfortable in our bodies, wherever life might position us, we can remain calm and peaceful; everything flows and everyone glows. It doesn't matter what it looks like from the outside, the light is on inside because someone's at home!

At the end of class, phone numbers were exchanged so that conversations could continue. I doubt that fatigue is something that these women experience very often...they seem to balance their lives quite gracefully.

Photo of the Duomo in Florence, Italy: GeneBurch. com

More Picnics!

"There's too much emotion, too much negative emotion: frustration, hatred, anger. I think that's the greatest obstacle. So I think as a first step this should be cooled down. Reduced. Forget these things. And I think for the time being, we need more festivals, more picinics. Let us forget these difficult things, these emotions, and make personal friends. Then we can start to talk about these serious matters."
Dalai Lama, quoted in Ode Magazine (September 2007)

In Saturday's yoga class, we talked about the benefits of keeping an open mind as I'd written a short post about it a few days earlier. We agreed that open minded people appear more youthful and vibrant. Every day brings them a chance for a new adventure.

While we all have opinions and thoughts on just about every subject imaginable, our beliefs should allow and encourage growth rather than a stubborn stagnation. As British writer Gilbert Chesterton said, "A weak mind is like a microscope, which magnifies trifling things but cannot receive great ones."

I like the Dalai Lama's suggestion to cool down and get happy through festivities. When we're not being challenged or threatened, our bodies can spend the time to heal and we're able to hear those instinctual whispers that lead us out of the ruts that habits form.

It will soon be the season for gathering and celebrating so this may be a good time to resolve to do things a bit differently. Celebrate with a new group of people or in a novel way or celebrate in the usual manner but with more positive attitudes and intentions.

You have nothing to lose. Either you'll make some new friends and have the best holiday season ever, or you'll acquire a new level of appreciation for the friends, family and traditions that you already have. If the thought of changing your holiday practices makes you uneasy, consider some of the introductory ideas listed on How to Exercise an Open Mind.

Photo:10 Questions for the Dalai Lama

Let's Make It Fit

Registrations are coming in for John Leebold's workshop here at Kona Yoga, June 22-26. If you live on Oahu, you may attend the workshop with John at Manoa Yoga. Tell Ray or Shelly that Kona Yoga sent you!

Due to the workshop schedule, several of our weekly classes will be cancelled.

• Saturday, June 23: 8am and 10am Classes
• Monday, June 25: 5:30pm Class
• Tuesday, June 26: 6pm Class

Please make every effort to attend as many workshop classes as possible. John is a teacher who inspires your teachers and we want to show him some true Kona Aloha!
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Yoga for Women. Effective this coming Saturday, June 16, this class will be extended by a half hour. Due to our discussion format at the beginning of class, the asana portion is sometimes "wanting". I've decided to change it to a 2 hour class with no additional fee.
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Tuesdays 6-7:30pm. The Beginning Yoga series ends this Tuesday and because of the enthusiasm of the class, I've decided to segue into a Creating a Home Practice class which will begin June 19.

The next Beginning Yoga class starts Tuesday, August 7.

Happy Kamehameha Day!

Photo:hb19

Ascent and Assent

When Yoga for Women was first offered, Krista and I wanted to address the typical female issues from the viewpoints of yoga and Traditional Chinese Medicine.

During the first year, we based our classes and discussions on The Woman's Book of Yoga and Health by Linda Sparrow and Patricia Walden. The moral of the story, the bottom-line for each class, turned out to be: take care of yourself, first. It's the only way you can insure the health and happiness of your loved ones.

Lately, we've been focused upon the subject of Happiness and the class seems to attract happy women. Women of all ages and in various stages of their lives. Strong women, not willing to fit into a cultural mold. Flexible women, willing to yield to disparate views.

Daily Dharma's post entitled Mountain Guides, an excerpt from "When the Iron Eagle Flies" by Ayya Khema offers this as a description of what we are experiencing:

A good spiritual friend who will help us to stay on the path, with whom we can discuss our differences frankly, sure of a compassionate response, provides an important support system which is often lacking. Although people live and practice together, one-upmanship often comes between them. A really good friend is like a mountain guide. The spiritual path is like climbing a mountain: we don't really know what we will find at the summit. We have only heard that it is beautiful, everybody is happy there, the view is magnificent and the air unpolluted. If we have a guide who has already climbed the mountain, he can help us avoid falling into a crevasse, or slipping on loose stones, or getting off the path. The one common antidote for all our hindrances is noble friends and noble conversations, which are health food for the mind.

Photo:Climbing Equipment

April 7, 2007

In today's class we decided that life during the past week definitely was looking up. Most of us continued with our comfort-seeking-mission through the last seven days.

Tricycle Magazine sent a relevant article a couple of days ago, befitting as always:

From a Fixed Vantage Point

Once you have located your own breath point with clarity, don't deviate from that spot. Use this single point in order to keep your attention fixed. Without having selected such a point, you will find yourself moving in and out of the nose, going up and down the windpipe, eternally chasing after the breath, which you can never catch because it keeps changing, moving, and flowing. If you ever sawed wood you already know the trick. As a carpenter, you don't stand there watching the saw blade going up and down. You would get dizzy. You fix your attention on the spot where the teeth of the blade dig into the wood. It is the only way you can saw a straight line. As a meditator, you focus your attention on that single spot of sensation inside the nose. From this vantage point, you watch the entire movement of breath with clear and collected attention. --Henepola Gunaratana, Mindfulness in Plain English

In determination to stay focused on moving up the emotional scale, there is also a helpful process referred to as segment intending: setting an intention for a specified amount of time. It could be for a day, an hour, or for the next natural segment of time you engage yourself (a meeting, an important phone call, or the drive home). Here's an article entitled The Size of Your Segment DOES Matter. I can't wait to see what the next week brings!

Photo: Frank Sutton (where are you, Frank?)

March 31, 2007

While it might appear as though Krista has passed out from too much water, she's actually created an alternative to Viparita Karani that is comfortable for her burgeoning belly.

Laying flat on her back puts too much pressure on her vena cava, and is also not the most comfortable in later stages of pregnancy. She rested for about 5 minutes before she switched and put her right leg up the wall.

 

We start these classes in what has become our Circle of Wisdom. After the usual opening poses, we gather and toss around themes and thoughts from the past week. No matter what the topic, we usually whittle it down to a persistant: Let's Take Care of Ourselves, first. Then we move into a related asana practice. The focus of today's restorative class was "making comfortable choices".

As important as it is to find and work at the edge of your capabilities during an active asana class, I think it's vital for us to allow for comfort during restorative yoga poses. Those reared in 'no pain, no gain' cultures often find it difficult to release the need to push and pull, equating effort with progress. Restorative classes are a perfect time to practice the art of letting go and to locate your body's comfort level while still paying attention to correct alignment. In essence, feeling good while doing good.

Everyone was encouraged to choose from a variety of poses that they would be able to hold for 10 minutes, but to also allow themselves to adjust for comfort. So Krista found a way to improve the circulation in her legs, safely and comfortably.

Image:Birth.com.au